Should I leave my husband?

-My husband talks to me like I am stupid all of the time and makes me look like an idiot. It is not only some of the things he says but how he says it. We have been together for 9 years and have had many "talks" but it is getting to the point where when he isn't being rude, I am just waiting for the punch line the whole time. Now he has recently started asking me to have a threesome with another woman. One of his own friends asks me why I put up with him and that I could do better! We have 2 boys that are 5 and 2 whom do not listen to me at all and I think it is because of the way he talks to me. I also am having to pay for child care to go to the gym and run errands unless I take the kids because he sleeps all day!!! I do not know what to do... I don't want to give up on our marriage but I am tired of putting up with the B.S. What do you all think?He sounds very passive aggressive.

You might consider trying marriage counseling since it doesn't sound like you have anything to lose. A counselor might uncover something in your husband's thinking that could be changed for the better.

I know what you mean about waiting for the next jab. I went through that, and even after my husband made changes for the better it took me five years to really relax.
but u have 2 kids who need father,

if he is bad father so leave him, if he looks after kids but doesnt pay attention to u, it is more or less ok because raising 2 boys alone is more difficult!

why he talks to u like that? it's very strange that he wants other woman.. maybe try to make him busy at home, with kids, with cooking etc..

sorry
Wow loads of women jump on this question like it's ie cream. Am not on your husband side neither on yours because am the type who likes to hear both side. If you see the matter that way then, my question is this; is there anything you're doing that could make your husband feel like your relationship require third lover. I know we men could be sometime be unpredictable at times but, have you talk face to face about this matter because I've never heard this before.
That is a shame the way he treats you. If your not happy with your relationship then do something about it. Nobody deserves to get treated like that. Actions speak louder than words. If you have had many talks and it's not working. Then do something about it and leave him. Find somebody that loves you and treats you how you should be treated.
before leaving do one thing sitt with him and talk about all issues and disscuss hope you will find a way because you have spend 9 years with him, cont just move without trying yo9urself to solve issues between both of you and if you fail to get any responce from him than move on live your life dont wait for him
Dump the loser. You don't say that he's employed but if he isn't and sleeps all day and will not watch after the kids I'd say he's not worth having around. Besides the fact that he belittles you. Find something better.
If its been this way for 9 years, and youve tried talking and letting him know how you feel.Then it should be clear he doesnt respect you.Its up to you if you want to spend the rest of your life with that kind of person.
I think you married a domineering, egotistical, self-centered fart. What the heck do you see in him to make you stay? Don't you respect yourself enough to go?
You don't want to give up on your marriage??? You don't have a marriage.

Dump him. Divorce him. Get child support, alimony and anything else that you can. Then see if he thinks you are stupid.
Sleeps all day?? No no, wake his *ss up girl!! I think you should tell him to respect you cuz your kids aren't listening to you aaannnddd you are his wife!
That would make me fall out of love with someone, and I wouldnt stay with someone i didn't love.
What marriage? Marriage is supposed to be a partnership between two friends and lovers. You should be teammates. Key is you are supposed to be on the same team! You are supposed to support each other, be there for each other no matter what, lift each other up never put each other down. It sounds like he's failing in all of that. It's a terrible example for your children and you already know that. That and he wants to cheat, if he hasn't already. Take the advice of his own friend--stop putting up with him and leave. You CAN do better.
Self-Esteem is a SELF ASSESSMENT. Only you can control how you look or react to interactions with other people including your husband.



So you look, sound & are behaving "like an idiot". Make sure to evaluate the rest of YOUR behavior because it would appear that you now have a parent-child relationship in your marriage. I highly suspect you are being treated like a child because you act like a child.



I think it is childish to ask total strangers "what to do" rather than communicating directly with your husband. WE out here cannot change YOU or your husband (whom you have conveniently left out of this loop). Either get to counselling with him OR immaturely initiate a divorce behind his back (while being egged on by the other immature women here). Your choice, but at least OWN your part in it.
If he knows how you feel and time and time again you tell him but he doesn't do anything about it, then he doesn't respect you. It does sound like you deserve better then that. 9 years is a long time and you do have two kids to think about, but that isn't a reason to stay in an unhappy marriage. If your kids are seeing him disrespecting you, then they will start talking to you the same way. You shouldn't be a doormat. Give him an ultimatum and stick to it. If he doesn't sort himself out, then your done. If he does truly love you then he will get his **** into gear. If not, then at least you know now and you move on from him. Good luck
I am married and i have two boys around the age where your boys are. And i think you should divorce with your husband my wife was acting the same way and my kids where being bad and not listening and when we got a divorce i got to keep my kids and they grew respect for me now i am re-married and i love it my new wife is nice and caring and loves my kids and now we have two identical twin baby girls and they are the most precious things i have ever seen in my life. take it from me if your husband is disrespecting you then you are not respecting yourself by putting up with him. I hope this helped
Before you leave him, record him.



Buy recording devices, audio and video if you can. Record his rants against you. Record him belittling you and calling you names.



Then, with the audio and video in hand, go to an attorney. You should be able to get a divorce on grounds of abuse and you will get more alimony and more child support.



Children have happy childhoods only if they are raised by happy parents. As long as you are miserable, you cannot be as good of a mother as you would have been able to be if you were happy.



You do not need to worry about wiretapping, because you can record things he says to you directly in person. People will have a hard time believing how nasty he is unless they hear it themselves, so go to the store and buy the recording devices.