What if ending contact with the other man isn't possible?

-If your spouse was having an emotional affair with her boss

- telling him issues about our marriage

- secret texts

- teasing (not physical)

- etc...



if you were at the point where the only way you would be happy is if your spouse ended all contact with the guy, but you cannot afford for your spouse to quit that job and there isn't any other jobs available, what would you do?



Right now, i want my spouse to end the text messaging, end the secrets, end the inappropriate talk altogether, and want her to quit her job so she isn't around him at all but we cannot afford for her to quit the job.



also, our marriage is rocky, so my spouse feels controlled and anxious as she would have to quit her job and then could lose the marraige and be totally screwed on her own...



i have no idea what to do.

talk to the guy?

talk to his wife?

is there anything i can do or am i just forced to agree for her to keep working there and hope that nothing happens when she is there with him?If your marriage is rocky then its this that needs help

If your wife is happy with this then she will not look elsewhere for attention

The emotional affair would stop and she could keep her job

Yes she would still have contact with him

But if your marriage was how it should be nothing would happen

Talk to your wife , not him or his wife

Show her you care and want her like he has ?
You wife IS having or pursuing an intimate relationship with her employer. That makes her a whore. Cut your losses & dump the woman. Find someone else who understands what a marriage & committed relationship means.
You need to decide what's most important, your marriage or the income. Until you make a choice and stand by it you're stuck.
If it were just the occasional BJ or something I could understand, but I'd say that is a bunch of BS.
It may be that your wife is being "wooed" by her boss and is feeling more confident in herself at work than at home. This is not your fault and possibly not hers either. We all want to feel loved, adored, and special. Unfortunately your wife is getting the need fulfilled at work by a man that has no business taking this position in her life instead of at home by her husband. I would advise doing 2 things.



1) Start noticing your wife's good attributes again and let her know she is still the apple of your eye. Tell her how much she means to you and not only tell her but show her by doing something that makes her realize she has importance in your life. You may also ask your wife to put herself in your position. How would she feel if the tables were turned?



2) Call her boss and let him know that you love your wife and plan on keeping her. Tell him his behavior is not appropriate and if he does not stop you will have no choice but to contact his boss (if there is one above him) and file sexual harassment charges.



If you go to church you may seek counseling from your pastor. I wish you the best of luck and pray that God bless your union.
This could just be totally innocent, and you are blowing it out of proportion. If you want it to continue and get worse, just be as controlling of her as possible and badger her night and day. That will also make her leave you in the end. The worst kind of man is controlling--just don't do it. If she says it's an innocent flirtation, believe her! What's so wrong with that? Don't you have any female friends you talk to? Talking to him or his WIFE?? Are you crazy?? That will make the whole thing blow up in your face. Chill out and be understanding, but tell her the texting really needs to stop.
Ok talk to your wife first. tell her your concerns but not in overbearing way. She already feels controlled maybe she is comfortable with him. Maybe he has some advice on your marriage he can give her. as for the teasing whatever if she is not calling him baby and grabbing some *** why worry so much? Girls can have Guy friends and it just so happens to be her boss the person she does spend alot of time with. Look at your relationship. Just sit back in your chair and think. How much time does she spend with her friends and not just yours? Do you constantly call her if she is out of eye sight. these are some things that bug women makes us think you don't trust us. Has she ever cheated on you that you know for sure? then why be so skeptic? Trust me if you sit back and think a bit and let her have some space not too much though don't let her like ... move out. but why not say hey honey why don't you go see a movie with your girls and then a few nights later take her out to dinner. show her that you love her and want it to work out.