Should child support have limitations and men should have custody?

-I currently pay $1600 a month in child support and $600 a month for healthcare for my three sons. When I have them I buy groceries and plan activities. My ex wants me to pay all co-pays for healthcare, sports fees and before and after school. She is remarried has my child support tax free, her husband is in management and she works as a teachers aid and a waitress. Yet she wants more from me. I don't get how this is possible. I even offered to her that I take our sons full time and she would never have to pay me a penny in child support. She could see the boys at any time. Of course she said NO. She wants the paycheck.



Mind you... She has new furniture, 3 flat screen TVS a new car and makes my boys use their birthday money to buy new sneakers or in the case of my oldest son his lacrosse gear. I make just enough to afford rent, car payment and groceries each month. I am remarrying myself and would welcome my sons regardless of child support. Is it fair that men pay for the women to move on and prosper?



Why can't the person who provides the most support have the children. I am a great father and she left me for the man she remarried. NYS was going to make me pay $1200 a month in Alimony on top of $1600 a month in child support so I could not fight for my sons. She forfeited alimony for custodial guardian on joint custody.No partner should have anything from the other after a break.Yes the should be limitations RECEIPTS should be required for each expenditure for the child or children.I may be talking from my **s but I feel you should revisit this case in front of the family courts to amend her confiscatory practices.Good luck.
Sadly this is very typical from the men I know that are divorced with children. My advice is to do as I did. Go for Sole custody. She didn't make any money so I didn't get awarded child support. (She wouldn't have paid anyway) but I did get the kids.
You pay according to your net income,if you think the numbers are way off then you need to get a lawyer and take it back to court!

If you're not willing to go back to court then you need to stop bit%hing and just pay up!
They usually base child support payments on your earnings...you must earn a lot of money.



You should have made the shared custody 50/50 split request during your divorce. The state does not set alimony - the attorneys wrangle that out...What kind of an attorney did you have and where the heck do you live? It sounds like you got the short end of the stick...



Almost all of the recently divorced couples I know share custody 50/50 with no child support to either side...You really got screwed.
I'm very sorry to hear it bro.



I know two personal acquaintances all the way over here in Oregon who have the same situation.



It's not just...it's not right...and it's a travesty that women can do this crap these days.



And then they wonder why we don't propose to them, and instead keep them as permanent girlfriends and baby-mommas?



And I'm not some backstreet thug trying to sound tough...I drive a sports car, have a corporate finance job, and go to church every Sunday. I'm about as clean cut, good boy as they come.



But I've done the math, and simply cannot see any upside to marriage these days. There is no security, there is no respect, and as soon as she tires of you, she can take your income for life!



Fortunately, more and more states (I wouldn't count on NY) are moving to dual custody models, where there is no child support and no alimony.



In your case, I hope your children are growing fast, because I think you'll be on the hook until they're all past 18.



Again bro...my sincere condolences.
Your situation is horrible. I really feel bad for you and I feel bad for your sons. I can't believe she made him use his own bday money to buy his lacrosse gear or they had to use any of their money to buy her anything that wasn't a Mother's or Birthday gift. Hopefully you can get this support amount lowered soon.



And no it is not fair that a man pay for a woman to move and prosper. But just wanted to say that not all women are like this. I have two children from my ex and he purposefully moved out of state and works under the table to avoid child support. And he has NEVER not once given me one dime. You are a good dad. Your kids are lucky. My sister's ex husband pays about what you pay but she has not remarried and works one full time job and one part time job to make ends meet. She also doesn't own a flat screen or a new car. She can't afford it with rent and everything else. They half my niece's health insurance. And she and my ex brother in law work together to make everything peaceful and comfortable for each other. He is satisfied with how she spends the child support money and they get along great. So not every woman is like your ex. It doesn't help things but I just wanted to give you a few examples at the opposite end of this spectrum so you don't think all women are like your ex. She sounds shallow and selfish.
Best Answer



When you play..you pay! You should of thought about this brandon before you got involved with this woman. What were you thinking?? Now your stuck with these high payments & to make matters worse you ex-wife could always get a live in boyfriend and both of them could enjoy all the money you give them.



You would of been better off just getting a hooker for the night...Now your stuck with a woman you will never have sex with & your still paying...



Just sayin...